Nigerian Divorcee Warns Women: Court Marriage Offers No Benefit, Only Captivity
A Nigerian divorcee has sparked a significant conversation by asserting that civil weddings, commonly referred to as court marriages, provide no advantages to women in Nigeria. In a widely circulated video on social media, the woman, who recently finalized her divorce, shared her personal ordeal and cautioned other women against opting for court weddings under the misconception that they offer protection in case of marital breakdown.
The Reality of Court Marriage According to a Divorcee
The divorcee explained that many Nigerian women insist on court weddings, believing it will be to their advantage if their marriages dissolve. However, she emphasized that the reality is starkly different. According to her, women stand to gain more from traditional weddings than from civil ceremonies. She stated, "A lot of Nigerian women feel court marriage is advantageous to them. Let me assure you that there is no advantage of court marriage to you as a Nigerian woman. The only thing that court marriage will do is to keep you captive in that marriage."
Financial and Legal Burdens of Divorce in Court Marriages
She highlighted the financial and legal challenges associated with divorcing in a court marriage. Without hesitation, she noted, "I can also tell you without filter in my mouth that a lot of women that married using court marriage are regretting it especially when they want to divorce their husbands." The process requires hiring a lawyer, with fees ranging from N500,000 to N1 million, a substantial sum for women already struggling in their marriages.
Additionally, divorce proceedings in court marriages are typically very lengthy. Many women she knows are complaining because they cannot divorce their husbands, especially when men refuse to initiate the process. She explained, "They will be like you the woman should go and file for it and when you are filing for divorce in court marriage, you might be spending nothing less than N2 million because if the man refuses to divorce you in court marriage, you will not be divorced."
Advocating for Traditional Marriage Over Civil or Church Ceremonies
The divorcee strongly believes that there is no advantage to marriage for a woman through court or church weddings. She advised, "If you want to go into marriage, just do your traditional marriage. There is no need of church wedding or church blessing, it is not necessary. You are only wasting your money because according to the Nigerian law, traditional marriage is traditional marriage, church marriage is also traditional marriage so why wasting your time doing church marriage."
She recommended that women simply perform a traditional marriage and move to their husband's house. In the event of a breakdown, she pointed out that customary courts offer a more accessible and affordable solution. "If the marriage breaks down tomorrow, just go to customary court. In customary court, you will not spend more than N100,000 from the beginning of the case to the end of the case. In customary court, there is nobody forcing you to stay in a marriage you do not want to," she concluded.
