Nigerian highlife singer Chinedu Okoli, popularly known as Flavour, has publicly disclosed his two-year struggle with masturbation, revealing that the habit began after he lost contact with the woman he lost his virginity to. The award-winning artiste made the candid revelation during a TikTok Live session, detailing how he turned to spiritual guidance and eventually overcame the addiction with the help of an older band member.
The Revelation: A Candid TikTok Live Confession
Flavour, known for hits like “Nwa Baby (Ashawo Remix),” opened up about his early sexual experiences and the emotional turmoil that followed. He explained that losing his virginity at age 24 had a profound impact on his life, especially after he could no longer reach the woman involved. In his words, “After getting disvirgined at 24, I began to look for the girl that disvirgined me, but at that time, there was no phone. She gave me her email, so I was going to the Cyber Café to email her back and forth. There was no response, so I gave up, and I had never had a girlfriend at the time aside from a normal childhood crush, and nothing happened between us.”
The lack of communication left him struggling, prompting him to confide in a friend who introduced him to Makoupa, a traditional African twerking dance adult content. “I then went to get the Mapouka CDs. Once everyone had slept in the house, I would watch it prepared. I even used Morning Fresh soap sometimes,” Flavour admitted.
Seeking Spiritual Help: A 21-Day Exercise and Relapse
Overwhelmed by shame and exhaustion, Flavour said he reached a low point where he needed to talk to someone. He approached his mother’s pastor for spiritual assistance. The pastor gave him prayer points, Bible verses, and a 21-day spiritual exercise. However, Flavour relapsed within days after attending a show. He recounted, “So I explained everything, and he gave me some prayer points and Bible verses I had to read every day. He gave me verses I had to read for 21 days. Then, I started fasting and all; it wasn’t even up to the weekend. That weekend I had a show, and the moment I started seeing girls' shapes as I was mounting the stage, I entered the toilet.”
Despite the setback, Flavour persisted, eventually finding a different kind of solution through an older member of his band.
The Turning Point: Advice from a Cameroonian Bassist
Flavour revealed that he mustered the courage to speak with an elderly Cameroonian bassist in his band, who offered practical advice. The bassist told him that his addiction stemmed from a lack of regular sexual activity. According to Flavour, “The bassist then told me the only reason I was caught in it is that I don’t have regular sex with a woman. He stated that seeing the girls at that age, I had to start engaging. After the whole thing, the man then took me to a brothel because it was difficult to find women, and that’s how the asewo (prostitute) was born.”
Flavour explained that the bassist helped him manage his finances to visit the brothel weekly, which ultimately curbed his addiction. He said, “Every week from the money I was sprayed, the man would remove some money to deposit. So, after we finish performing, I go knack. Since I started, masturbation stopped.”
Impact and Reflection
Flavour’s confession offers a rare glimpse into the personal struggles of a public figure, highlighting the intersection of sexual health, spirituality, and cultural norms. His story also sheds light on the challenges of discussing intimate issues in a society where such topics are often taboo. The singer’s journey from spiritual fasting to seeking advice from a bandmate underscores the importance of finding workable solutions, even if unconventional.
Flavour rose to national prominence with “Nwa Baby (Ashawo Remix),” a 2010 hit that became one of Nigeria’s biggest highlife songs. While the track’s lyrics explored themes of romance and sexuality, the singer has now shared the personal experiences that shaped his understanding of intimacy long before his rise to fame.
