In a powerful revelation about growing up intersex in Nigeria, Roshaante Anderson has opened up about the intrusive and often "creepy" questions adults consistently asked him during his childhood.
Understanding Intersex Identity
Roshaante Anderson was born with both male and female sexual organs, a condition known as being intersex. This means his genitals, chromosomes, or reproductive organs didn't fit strictly into male or female categories. He appeared female at birth but discovered his intersex status at age 11 when doctors found his inverted testicles during an ultrasound investigating abdominal pain.
"Everything made sense at that point," Roshaante recalled about the diagnosis. Growing up with limited information about intersex people, he initially assumed he was just a normal child until puberty highlighted the differences and began making him feel alienated.
The Inappropriate Questions and Childhood Struggles
Roshaante described his parents as supportive, allowing people to refer to him as "he" while sometimes using female pronouns in certain social situations. They didn't enforce strict gender roles and let him wear boys' clothes.
However, adults consistently subjected him to uncomfortable questioning. "I came across loads of different comments from my friends' parents and stuff like that all the time," he told YouTube show People are Deep. "They would constantly ask: 'Do you sit down or do you stand up to go toilet?'"
Reflecting on these experiences, Roshaante noted: "I'm just like, listen, relax, I'm a kid, stop asking me all these questions. You're sexualising me in a way. It's a bit creepy. I didn't feel uncomfortable at the time but when I think about it now, I'm like, you put up with way too much, man."
His school experiences were equally challenging. He wasn't allowed to change in girls' facilities because his clitoris "was like a very small dick," creating what he called a "constant battle." Some skeptical parents even asked him to lift his shirt because they didn't believe he was a girl.
Surgical Journey and Self-Acceptance
Despite these challenges, Roshaante never let the probing questions damage his self-esteem. "Never have I ever felt a way about myself at all," he declared. "I'm in love with myself and I feel like I've got good reason to be as well. I'm unique, I'm an individual who knows exactly what they want."
He eventually opted for surgery, spending nearly £80,000 on a phalloplasty procedure where doctors created a fully functioning penis using skin from his arm. The complex process involved lengthening his urethra and inserting an erectile device to enable sexual function.
"Phalloplasty is basically a surgical procedure where they remove fat, muscle, arteries, veins, skin, from the arm to sculpt a penis," Roshaante explained to Channel 4's Skin Deep series, pointing to the scar on his forearm. The reconstructed organ remained without a penis head for about one to two years before completion.
Now identifying as pansexual, meaning he's attracted to people regardless of their sex, gender, or race, Roshaante has found that "men and women both love me - straight, lesbian, gay, bi, anything." He started dating a 24-year-old girl when he was just 16, and even found himself attracting interest from her friends.
Roshaante's story highlights the importance of understanding intersex conditions and the need for greater public education about gender diversity in Nigerian society.
